Clothing Size

The last couple of days, I noticed that my clothes fit better. I tend to buy clothing that is a bit too small. When I would gain weight, I tried to pretend that my clothing still fit. When it was too painfully obvious they did not, I really needed a couple of sized bigger than I was wearing. None the less, I would just buy the next size, saying to myself, "You'll lose the weight, so I don't want to buy clothes that will be too big in a couple of weeks." Talk about fooling myself.

Now that it has been over 6 weeks since I started living a fit lifestyle, I finally have noticed a difference. Mind you, my clothes are still too small, but the buttons do not strain as much, the belt does not cut in as much, and I don't feel quite so uncomfortable in my clothes.

It used to be that when the days activities were over and I was in for the night, I would hurry to change into some sweat pants and an oversized sweatshirt. That was the only time I felt comfortable. I still find them comfortable, but I no longer rush to change because I am so miserable in my regular clothing.

This time as I lose weight, I am going to wait until it is painfully (joyfully) obvious that they are just way too big for me. I am not sure how long that will take, but I will sure enjoy the first time I need to get some new clothes. It will happen, I just need to be patient.

Week 6 Weigh-In

Today the scale read 352.8 lbs. I lost 4.8 lbs. this week. I believe cutting out the nuts and all the exercise is working out. Now if I lose at least 2.8 lbs., it will be time for another disgusting picture.

Despite the stress and emotional anguish I have felt from my job situation, I have enjoyed feeling energetic at times. I have not felt energetic in a long time. Even though, it is not constant, it feels great. I am happy I started living a fit lifestyle. Seeing the difficulty I have had in my life lately, I dread to think how much worse I would have handled it. I also wish I had done this sooner because I would be able to handle this much better.

This is the beginning of another great fitness week. I know I will not be losing that much weight every week. In fact, that much weight loss will become rare if existent at all in the future. The point is that I am becoming more fit each day.

I did not put whether or not I met my goal for this week. I am sure I met my goal, but honestly, I do not remember what it is. I have it my journal in my office. When I realized that I did not know my target, I thought that I was being lazy. How could I not know my goal? Then, I changed my mind. I reminded myself that my ultimate goal is not weight loss, but fitness.

Don't get me wrong. I still want to see lots of weight loss. I want to lose it all tomorrow. So I keep reminding myself that fitness is my goal which inlcudes weight loss at this point. It seems like a psychological game at this point, but I hope it will eventually sink in.

Avoiding Temptation

It seems like temptation is everywhere. Yet as I look back, I have not had all that many temptations. Here are a few things that I think have helped curb temptations:

1) Eating mandatory healthy snacks keeps me from feeling empty
2) Never shopping on an empty stomach
3) Never shoppping without a meal plan and a list (no wandering up and down aisles thinking this would be good for a dinner)
4) Keeping active. Commit to a hobby in place of TV.
5) Exercise helps me to get to sleep faster. This helps those late night cravings. If a I feel hungry, I think that I might as well go to bed so I can eat in the morning.
6) I normally drink some water or tea while winding down for the night. This helps curb late night cravings, as it keeps my stomach from feeling empty.
6) Thinking. Before I give in to an urge to eat unhealthy or a larger portion or at night, I take a moment to think it through. Is it worth it? Am I truly hungry? Will I still want that after I drink a cup of water and eat some carrots?

Story:
We purchase sugar-free fudgicles. Often one of these is my after dinner snack. They are low calorie. They take while to eat. They curb sweet and chocolate cravings. Anyhow, one night I had a meeting so I did not get this after dinner snack. I got home around 9PM and said to myself, "You didn't get your snack and even though I am past my eating time (7PM-3 hours before bedtime), I deserve my snack. I did not feel guilty. After all it was low calorie.

I pulled it out of the fridge and set it down at the computer. I grabbed a cup of water and returned to putz on the computer and enjoy my fudgicle. I took a sip of water and was going to open the fudgicle when I stopped to think about it. My first question to myself was "Did I really want to eat this late?" My answer was I want something sweet and chocolate. After all this was not Ben & Jerry's or a batch of cookies. Before I proceeded, I asked myself if I was hungry. I thought about it. I was not hungry. At that point I realized that I wanted to eat out of a sense of entitlement. That sounded like a stupid reason to eat especially for someone in my shape. I put that fudgicle back and was happy that I did not eat for such a dumb reason.

Weigh In

Today I weighed 357.6 lbs. I lost 2.4 lbs since last Monday.

I was a little disappointed. I had hoped to lose at least 1 more pound, but I will take any weight loss. Having started my exercise routine. I thought I would lose weight quicker. There could be a number of reasons I did not 1) I should not expect to sustain the amount of weight loss that I saw in the first few weeks, 2) I may have lost more in fat, but it was offset by muscle gain, 3) I think I have been letting my portion sizes get bigger, 4) I have been eating nuts as snacks, 5) I ate out 3 days in a row (Friday-Sunday). While I did not make horrible choices, I could have done better.

My plan for this week is to 1) maintain my exercise routine, 2) Look into buying calipers to measure fat, 3) watch my portion sizes, 4) replace the nuts with low fat popcorn 100 calorie packs, 5) not eat out, 6) be thankful that I am living fit no matter what the scale says.

NUTS: I read that walnuts, pistachios, and peanuts have the omega3 fats which increases the "good" cholesterol. I think that this triggered in my mind the idea that eating nuts was healthy. But I was wrong. Despite the benefits of nuts, they are still high in fat and calories. If you buy them in cans, many of them add peanut oil to boot. Perhaps if I could eat just a few they would be fine, but I find myself eating a handful here and there throughout the day. Instead, I will have lowfat microwave popcorn. I found a brand that makes a 100 calorie pack. They are more filling than nuts. I think they are a whole grain, so they are not completely wasted calories like the snack pack cookies.

Motivating Factors

1) I want to be a good example for my kids
2) I want to actively play with my kids rather than sit and watch them
3) I don't want to die and leave my wife without her husband and my kids without their father
4) I don't want to go through surgery like gastric bypass or the bands. From what I understand, they are not fool-proof. Besides, why should I pay for and expensive surgery to force me to do what I could do for free. In addition, if I don't start living a healthy lifestyle, the affects of the surgery can be undone. So if I need to live that lifestyle with the surgery, I might as well do so without it.
5) I want to be fit. I enjoy being active.
6) I want to buy clothes at a normal store and from a the normal section
7) I want to look good for my wife
8) I want more energy

These are not ranked in any particular order

A Little Fitness Background

My first vivid memories of poor eating habits where from my childhood. I remember being over to a friends house. They kept a ton of junk food around. One day, my friends told to eat whatever I wanted. Hah! I was like a kid in a candy factory, only it included cookies, chips, and pop. From then on, I always tried to mooch stuff when I went over.

At home, there was sugary cereals. I liked to sneak into them and eat all the marshmellow bits. I would get in trouble, but I still did it.

My activity level was normal. I played outdoor games with the neighbors like kick the can, hide and go seek, and tag. I rode my bike everywhere. None the less, I got fat.

By the time I reached 4th grade, I was the butt of jokes and quite porky. I might ask if my parents were to blame. To some extent, they probably were. But only for then. I don't blame them for my current condition. That 4th grade year, we moved. Where we moved, I saw a flyer for midget football. So, the summer preceding 5th grade, I joined the football team.

There was a problem though. I guess for safety reasons, there were weight limits. In order to play a game with those in my age group, I had to be under a certain weight. Guess what? I was too heavy. My mother put me on a diet and I exercised hard with the team. Eventually, I lost enough weight to play. From then on, I continued to play sports through my sophomore year in high school. I was never skinny, but I was physically fit.

Then came college. I lived on campus. The dorm meals were all you can eat. I played a little volley ball. I can't remember what these sports were called, but they were just teams that competed against other teams at the college. No coaches or anything. I also played raquetball. None the less, I packed on the weight with terrible foods I chose to eat in abundance.

While at college, I became engaged. During the summer I got married, I went on a "diet" and lost quite a bit of weight. It was one of those weigh the food, count exchanges type diets. I tried to keep it up after the wedding. I sort of did for a while. I also made a habit of going to the gym to workout. Once, I went to graduate school that all stopped. Over the next few years my weight went up and down. The problem was that each time the weight never went down as much as the previous time and always went higher than the previous.

About 5 years ago, I went gung ho on an exercise and eating program for a good 9 months. Then I got strep throat which through my routine out of wack. I never quite went back to the routine I had before I got sick, though I tried. From time to time, I would allow myself some indulgences which I would not have done previously. Soon, the cookies, ice cream, and candy became more regular and the exercise less regular. Some where in there, I just gave up the healthy lifestyle I previously enjoyed. I kept telling myself I would go back to it, but it did not happen until about 1 month ago.

Today I weighed in at 360 lbs. My goal was 361. This makes my weight loss around 20 lbs so far. Since it is the next ten pounds, I will post some more of those gross pictures. At my weight, I can't really tell the difference. The percentage difference in weight is so much smaller than it would be for someone closer to a healthy weight. However, I still look forward to seeing a difference, no matter how gradual.

"Diet" NOT, but part of my living fit lifestyle

The word "diet" is a legitimate word to describe what I will outline. Basically, anything we eat is our diet. However, the phrase "to go on a diet" means that we are going to change our eating patterns. In my mind, "going on a diet" means temporarily changing our eating patterns. My goal is to permanantly change my eating patterns. So I avoid calling what I am doing a "diet." It is simply how I am making food part of my living fit lifstyle.

I am not a nutrition expert, doctor, or anything else that gives me any credentials to recommend, develop, or critique any "diet." These are simply things that I have gleaned from some of the "diets" I have tried and some books and articles I have read. I hope that I have added a dose of common sense. My first 2 weeks, I tried a popular "diet" which forbade breads, cereals, grains, or pastas AND FRUIT. It was at the end of the first 2 weeks that I came to my sense and realized what a wacko "diet" that was. I ignored my common sense which was screaming at me, "Any 'diet' that forbids fruits is insane!!!!!!" I then turned to a few websites which wanted to charge me money weekly to tell me to eat healthy. Being the cheapo that I am, I decided that I knew enough to avoid "dieting" and simply start living a lifestyle of fitness. Here is the plan I came up with for my eating habits:

Food Do's & Dont's:
1) Only eat whole grain breads, pastas, cereals, and rice. (Check labels and ignore claims)
2) #1 will never be the main dish of a meal.
3) No potatoes except sweet potatoes.
4) Added fats will be in the form of olive or canola oil. Salad dressing will be home made and oil based. Instead of butter use a heart smart spread.
5) #3 will be used sparingly
6) No high sugar fruits such as canned fruit, fruit juice, or dried fruit. (No pineapple or bananas either)
7) No more than 1 serving of lowfat cheese (not including cottage cheese) a day.
8) No food with sugar added.
9) Sugar substitute may be used sparingly
10) Red meat only once a week
11) No foods which do not have a positive net sum of nutritional value. (For example, apples have good positive nutritional value, but covering them with caramel or baking them in a pie cancels out the nutrition of the apple)

Follow these habits:
1) Eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner
2) Eat 3 snacks each day: mid-morning, mid-afternoon, and after dinner
3) Sip 8 oz. of water before each meal and snack
4) Divide each meal into 2 parts. The first part is eaten immediatly following the cup of water. The second part is not eaten until at least 15 minutes after you began drinking the water. In this way, it should take at least 20 minutes to eat the meal giving the brain enough time to realize that there is food in the stomach.
5) Use serving sizes to measure food.
5) Only 1 helping of food. No seconds.
6) No breads, grains, pastas, rice, couscous, potatoes, etc... after 4 PM
7) No eating after 7 PM

The following is the meal planning guide I came up with:
Breakfast
First Course:
- Slowly drink one cup of water, not all in one swallow
- One serving of whole grain (bread, cereal)
- One serving of dairy (low fat milk or yogurt)
Second Course:
- 15 minutes after the water 1-2 servings of protein (egg beaters or cheese or turkey bacon, cottage cheese)
- 1-2 servings of fruit

Mid-morning Snack
- Slowly drink one cup of water, not all in one swallow
- Vegetable
- 1 serving of protein (string cheese, nuts, hard boiled egg, etc…)

Lunch
First Course:
- Slowly drink one cup of water, not all in one swallow
- Vegetables (Not carrots every day)
Second Course:
- 15 minutes after the water 1 serving of protein (chicken, low-fat lunch meat, nuts)
- 1 serving of starch (whole grain bread, rice, or pasta or a sweet potato)
- 1 serving of fruit

Mid-afternoon Snack
- Slowly drink one cup of water, not all in one swallow
- Vegetable
- One serving of dairy (low fat milk or yogurt)

Dinner
First Course:
- Slowly drink one cup of water, not all in one swallow
- Vegetables (Not carrots every day)
- One serving of dairy (low fat milk or yogurt)
Second Course:
- 15 minutes after the water 1 serving of protein (chicken, fish, turkey, beef*)
- Vegetables (Squash-legumes are acceptable)
- 1-2 serving of fruit

After Dinner Snack (No later than 7PM)
- Slowly drink one cup of water, not all in one swallow
- Freebie (Anything but starches) e.g. sugar free fudgicle

That's the plan, and I am nearing the end of my second week eating this way.

Fitness Goals

My fitness goals are:

1) Daily eat healthy, nutritious, well-proportioned meals. See my "diet" post.
2) Exercise on a regular basis. See my exercise post.
3) Reduce my body fat to a healthy level. (Lose about 190 lbs.)
4) Be able to run 5 miles
5) Take up Kayaking
6) Have a positive disposition
7) Be energetic

* Note: All the above goals are ongoing except #3

Half Man

On January 28, 2007 I began my journey of fitness. About one and a half weeks into it, I received a home scale that weighs up to 400 lbs. I was praying that I did not tip this scale. Hoping for the best and expecting the worse, I ended in between. My weight was at 370 lbs. Since I started "dieting" over a week before I weighed myself (and you usually lose quite a bit of water weight the first week), I estimate that I weighed around 380 lbs when I began. I am a 6'2" tall male with a big frame. BMI indexes shows that I should weigh around 190 lbs. Hence the name of this blog, "Half Man." One of my fitness goals is to lose half my body weight.

I decided to blog my journey to fitness in hopes that in doing so, I will be motivated to keep on track. I hope that I might get some encouraging feedback along the way. Part of my motivation will be the inclusion of some disgusting pictures of myself. I hope to take pictures whenever I lose 10 lbs.