330

I just figured out that Monday will mark my 330th week since I started at 380 lbs.  That's 6 years 17 weeks.  I was convinced that that would be my last time up and down the weight roller coaster.  For some strange, delusional reason,  I kept telling myself that I could and would quickly lose the weight again, and it would only take me 6-8 weeks.

The weight was only a side affect of the real problem.  I stopped living a fit lifestyle.  Well, I can certain come up with the list of excuses.  I could easily blame my Achilles tendon for it.  The fact is that when I couldn't run, I eventually quit trying to live fit.  Well, that is not entirely true.  I have made some efforts.  I even tried going vegan last year.  It wasn't all that bad.  I learned to like some new foods such as kale.  But it wasn't for me.  I made lots of attempts at exercise including speed walking.  However, I wasn't consistent.

This is getting too depressing.

I don't know if there is a deeper problem.  Is there is some psychological reason that I have yet to address?  Is there some issue that until I deal with it, I will always be on this roller coaster?  Or is it more base?  I love food, especially the high fat, high sugar types.  Am I simply just giving in?  Deep down, am I simply just unable and unwilling to live fit?  I don't know the answer.

I do know that I am living a fit lifestyle today.  I am tracking my calories.  I am making healthy choices.  I am exercising.  I plan to do the same tomorrow, but I just need to get through today before I can worry about tomorrow.

Living Fit Is My #1 Job!