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Saturday, July 14, 2007

Learning Moment

If you have been reading this blog, you know about some of the things going on in my life. On Thursday, I spent the day with my father (he's staying with my sister until the end of the summer) while contemplating the interview I was going to have on Friday morning, and praying that my wife didn't go into labor while I was 3 hours away from home. My father and I were walking around Dick's Sporting Goods when I get a phone call. It was my brother in Florida. He had been arrested for DUI the night before, and his van with all his worldly possessions in it was impounded. Without getting into all the details of my brother's life, suffice it to say that he has drug and alcohol problems. The gist of the phone call was that he wanted me to send him money to get his van out of the impound.

@#$#%@$@@@#$%@#@$#!!!!!

I just sent him some money a couple of weeks ago for another issue. I told him then that there be no more money to send him after that. So this time I told him that I had no money to send him. I told him to call around to the Salvation Army and other churches to find some help. If they couldn't help, they would be able to direct him to people that could. Even if they didn't get his car for him, they would give him food, clothing, and maybe even some shelter. He didn't want to do that. He said that as soon as they heard he was arrested for DUI they wouldn't help him. I told him that he didn't know that. They certainly won't help him if he doesn't ask, but they might if he does. He didn't like that suggestion. Eventually, he hung up on me.

You might think that I am heartless and cruel to my brother. But 1) I do not have any money especially with a fifth child on the way, 2) Even though, I could send him money from dad, it wouldn't help him because 3) a few years back, he had his truck impounded after he rear ended a cop car, and last year he had his previous van impounded, 4) he would call again in a couple of months because he would need money for something else, 5) he is almost 46 years old and has not learned to make it on his own.

Anyhow, the phone call upset me. I am a little worried that he might end up doing something criminal or end up dead. He is on methadone so he will get sick pretty quickly without any money.

After the phone call, my father and I went to a restaraunt for dinner. I had a nice salad and talapia. This was where my learning moment came. I was thinking about my brother throughout the meal which for me lasted about 0.5 seconds. I wolfed down my entire meal with incredible speed. However, I did not realize it until I was done. In fact, I don't even remember eating. I remember sitting there looking at my dad who had barely made a dent in his meal when I realized my entire dinner had disappeared.

As I have examined my past eating habits, I never found any evidence that I was an emotional overeater. Now, it popped up at that dinner. I imagine if I had an entire pizza in front of me, bag of cookies, or half gallon of ice cream, I would have done the same thing. Thankfully, I had something good for me. None the less, now I know that I must be conscience of my eating when I find myself aggitated and upset like that.

BTW, the interview went well. I interviewed with the recruiter so after they do some background checks, they will give me a call back so that I can interview with regional director. I am confident that I can get the job if I want it. I am going to look at a few other possibilities, but this looks promising.

Living Fit Is My #1 Job!

9 comments:

Spidey said...

Nearly every OBESE person is an emotional over-eater. How many slices of pizza have you wolfed down that you never remembered? That is the extreme example of denial, eating and not remembering the meal. It happens to alcoholics too (drinking and not remembering--though at some point it is the alcohol that causes the memory loss). Not sure about drug users. You are a food addict, just like me.

Spidey said...

BTW, good luck with the job interview! What kind of job is it?

Half Man said...

Spidey - I don't think I am in denial. I have no reason to deny being an emotional over-eater. I simply have seen little evidence of it for myself.

This particular situation, I did not over eat, but I could have. I didn't remember eating because I was intensely focussed on my brother. Come to think of it, I don't remember driving to the restaurant either.

In the near future, I think I will write a post on my whole self-analysis journey.

As far as the job goes, I want to see what others come up with on your website.

Sayre said...

GOod call on the money and your brother. By bailing him out over and over again, you and/or your family enable him to continue his destructive cycles. When you change the rules, he has to do something different. And seriously - with a fifth child about to make an appearance, you're gonna need every spare penny for diapers and food. You earned it - you use it.

Emotional eater. How about unconscious eater? You don't remember eating or even getting to the restaurant - you cannot let your brother have that much power over you!!!! Don't pick up a fork unless you know what you're doing. Don't drive that way either for that matter. Both habits could kill you eventually, you know...

Cripes... I'm running off at the mouth today! I'll shut up now.

Christine said...

Glad you had the strength to say no to your brother. That was a really hard thing to do - but the best thing you could have done. He would just end up calling you again - same story. It's gotta be the hardest thing in the world - but you did good. Good luck with the upcoming birth of baby - how exciting. Can't wait to hear what you name baby. Christine is a great name - lol. :) Take care of yourself and of your family first. :)

Megan said...

Can I just say finding this blog has been amazing for me, definatly helpful. I know I've gone off track from my day to day routine, with it being summer and all, and I've gained a lot of weight back. You've helped me to catch myself, and I feel after seeing your blog that I am now able to help my dad lose the weight that is hindering him from having a fun fit lifestyle. Thank you so much. I really would love to continue reading yoru blog and I am going ot send the link to my father as well. Good luck with the job and your brother. :)

Kim Ayres said...

Sayre just wrote everything I was going to say - both about your brother and the unconscious eating. It's amazing how much more you get out of your food if you take complete notice of every mouthful.

Half Man said...

Sayre, Christine, and Kim - Dealing with my brother has certainly been difficult. It will not get any easier in the future. I appreciate your thoughts.

Megan - Welcome to my blog. I am humbled and honored that you have found my site helpful. Best of luck to you and your father.

CactusFreek said...

You weren't heartless toward your brother at all. With people who are "takers", you really have to draw a line in the sand. You did good! :o)